Mom's day

i called my mom in the morning and said i'd send her something in the mail this week

will i?

she said "you don't have to", as if she knew my money trouble and lack good time sense

my mom used to tell me stories about how when i was young i used to see cars on the street and had a "sixth sense", i told her what cars were dangerous and, sure enough, they would swerve into her lane and cause a great number of middle fingers to fly

which brings me to my next thing, i've never gotten into an accident, maybe that "sixth sense" is still around.

haha, and that reminds me, i don't believe in knocking on wood.
why, if i did, i'm sure i'd be punching my penis all day long