ok so i promised a story. long overdue.

random comment of the day by coworker and only female of the geek squad:

"girls don't dress sexy and hot and cute just to impress guys, they dress to impress women, its about competition"

if it could make it any easier. the greatest story you will ever tell someone is about some event in your life. so basically its gonna be about your life. and the way i see it, this tells my life pretty well.

you know what. i really should go enlist in the coast guard for the 2 year program.

that way all those fucking chicks that are with boyfriends can get their 2 year fuck over with and date a real dude.

a dude who has been on his own. doesn't depend on mama and papa.
a dude who has been there and back. doesn't need to go anywhere.
a dude who can't get his foot in the fucking door.

ain't nothing happening now. every single, wait lemme think. every SINGLE girl i know know has a boyfriend. and i use the word SINGLE loosely. just like the girls.

wtf. last time i check there was a pretty even ratio of men to women in the world. why do girls just settle. or have guys just now become so suave they can go from 0 to woo in under 60 seconds? i can understand. girls. everyday, you are bombarded by penis. guy IMs you. penis. guy sees you at school. penis. there is penis in your face 24-7 and you aren't even a stripper.

so my objective here is to get the penis out of your face and keep it in my pants.

and you know what i get for it? nothing. i don't get the cute girl i have an eye on at school. i don't get the nice girl i meet online. i don't even get the chubby girl who bumps into me on purpose at the mini food market.

nice guys finish last? fuck that. that would be nice. we don't even get to start!

a bad ass part of me also tells me, that won't work either. girls say they want a spontaneously fun guy. but if i came up driving to you on a motorcycle with tickets to the band you've been dying to see, you'd probably just hide in your study cave and worry about your fucking test.

so the guys that SPECIFICALLY get the girl. they are neither bad ass or good guy. are they are either driven by the combination of desperation, greed, and stitch of confidence? maybe some whack sense of humor that makes them laugh. maybe they are just damn lucky.

comming to grips with the luck of these guys. and my own bad luck. now i'm just complaining about my luck. useless. so thats what it comes down to. sitting waiting wishing. why doesn't the right girl just fall from the sky already and break my neck so we could end it all together. the weather today is slightly longing with a chance of mild anger.

you know porn stars? they get everything augmented. they end up getting plastic surgery on their face, boobs, stomach, butt, legs. funny, i did that from head to toe.

anyway, point i'm getting to, isn't even tho their body is completely fake, they still keep one thing real. their fucking pussy.

and point is. even tho time goes on and they fuck and fuck and fuck. they end up having to get even one more augementation.

and guess what that is.

they sow up their fucking pussy. because they became so loose and slutty it becomes like fucking a hollowed out baseball bat from the top.

then the guy has to figure out something else to fuck.

so thats where we get anal sex from.

fuck this. i'm too mad to continue. i'm out.

concert tommorrow. a combination of jimmy eat world and taking back sunday in the mp3 player has made me a very uncharacteristical emo-ish angsty mad. pardon.