i'm a hair smeller.
and a hair player. i can't stop messing with her hair.
maybe i'm even a bit of a prude.
well its been what, a year and a half. maybe i'm rusty.
kisses on the cheek are more like faces landing on my lips. but when things feel right you don't need to feel anything but the simpleness of not being wrong.
falling. in. something. but not that.
not gonna say much. i totally don't want to jinx it.
but.... i never want to forget meeting her or the stuff we did together.
maybe she'll write it down in her blog. thats all i can hope for.
the best parts are the parts i can't say. but i'll have to.
the similarities in personality and likes are uncanny.
i'm totally being non-chalant about it tho. probably the most unromantic i've ever been in my life. i'm not putting in enough effort. i will though. it will pay off if she hangs around long enough.
Sunday, May 29, 2005
like likes like.
pretty universal.
opposites only attract in physics. and stephen hawking has already proven physics is so flawed.
the property of like. one letter off my name transforms me into like. two letters off and i'm love.
your love. there are many like it. but there is only one that is yours.
until you find it, satisfaction is only taken away from you and never given.
deep oceans crossed and hurricanes come to mind as loves we find along the way.
so far behind are those things. and if some damn oceanographer hadn't taken the pictures would be no evidence their existance.
talking it on here jinxes it. so say no more on here will i.
pretty universal.
opposites only attract in physics. and stephen hawking has already proven physics is so flawed.
the property of like. one letter off my name transforms me into like. two letters off and i'm love.
your love. there are many like it. but there is only one that is yours.
until you find it, satisfaction is only taken away from you and never given.
deep oceans crossed and hurricanes come to mind as loves we find along the way.
so far behind are those things. and if some damn oceanographer hadn't taken the pictures would be no evidence their existance.
talking it on here jinxes it. so say no more on here will i.
Saturday, May 28, 2005
as a biologist. i have found their answers to the simple questions of life.
its in the study guide.
24) Why do we seek mates, love our children and nurture their development?
a) we inherited such traits from ancestors who successfully reproduced, and such traits were helpful in ensuring their lifetime inclusive fitness
22) Why do we grow old and die?
c) because selection maximizes fitness, not longevity
21) Who are you and why are you here?
a) I am one of about 6 billion Homo sapiens, a hominid primate, here because my ancestors reproduced successfully
its in the study guide.
24) Why do we seek mates, love our children and nurture their development?
a) we inherited such traits from ancestors who successfully reproduced, and such traits were helpful in ensuring their lifetime inclusive fitness
22) Why do we grow old and die?
c) because selection maximizes fitness, not longevity
21) Who are you and why are you here?
a) I am one of about 6 billion Homo sapiens, a hominid primate, here because my ancestors reproduced successfully
drunk off my ass again.
jong came back. we celebrated.
hookah and beer. i am probably being shunned by a certain other group of friends, but fuckem.
its a common occurence for me to run my fucking mouth. its in the contract. shouldn't be fine print, bold face.
fuck you all you fucking people who can't take the truth being told about you.
jong came back. we celebrated.
hookah and beer. i am probably being shunned by a certain other group of friends, but fuckem.
its a common occurence for me to run my fucking mouth. its in the contract. shouldn't be fine print, bold face.
fuck you all you fucking people who can't take the truth being told about you.
Tuesday, May 24, 2005
strangest dream the other day.
i dreamt i was god and produced hundreds of headless kittens. they all functioned fine, except they were headless. i'm not sure if you could hear them "meow" or not. maybe the meow came from somewhere inside their body like another tiny kitten inside the kitten trapped trying to get out of its stomach.
on the good side i havent had that dirt bike dream in a while.
the one where i'm in the desert like the one at my old old house. i just keep making jumps with a dirt bike... eventually my friends find me. after years. like 10 years pass. rip van winkle. they find me and ask what i've been doing all these years. some are crying.
and i just say, "just doing jumps". "just doing jumps".
i dreamt i was god and produced hundreds of headless kittens. they all functioned fine, except they were headless. i'm not sure if you could hear them "meow" or not. maybe the meow came from somewhere inside their body like another tiny kitten inside the kitten trapped trying to get out of its stomach.
on the good side i havent had that dirt bike dream in a while.
the one where i'm in the desert like the one at my old old house. i just keep making jumps with a dirt bike... eventually my friends find me. after years. like 10 years pass. rip van winkle. they find me and ask what i've been doing all these years. some are crying.
and i just say, "just doing jumps". "just doing jumps".
antique posts, because you know you like it.
Friday, February 28, 2003
You should talk to me on AIM, i might say something stupid like this!
sailorsMoOn: so what kinda fun things do u have planned for this weekend?
CuteSamurai: well
CuteSamurai: band practice hopefully
CuteSamurai: and i might be starting my own fart!
CuteSamurai: i mean....FRAT
CuteSamurai: LOLOLOL
posted by luke at 7:56 PM
Enjoy my ramen haiku:
Ramen, my soul food
Boils happily in a pot
I eat it, such joy!
and if you don't like ramen, you suck!
Friday, February 28, 2003
You should talk to me on AIM, i might say something stupid like this!
sailorsMoOn: so what kinda fun things do u have planned for this weekend?
CuteSamurai: well
CuteSamurai: band practice hopefully
CuteSamurai: and i might be starting my own fart!
CuteSamurai: i mean....FRAT
CuteSamurai: LOLOLOL
posted by luke at 7:56 PM
Enjoy my ramen haiku:
Ramen, my soul food
Boils happily in a pot
I eat it, such joy!
and if you don't like ramen, you suck!
Sunday, May 22, 2005
someone threw a penny in my fountain of youth.
feels like i fell asleep on my brain.
currently addicted to:
lux (risk-like video game)
gish (sonic the hedgehog with slow speeds and a blob)
gas station drinks (thats what i call them, any novelty drink like yoo-hoo)
digitally imported (vocal trace radio station on winamp)
dota (as usual)
various nuts
various sunflower seeds
toasted bagels @ the mercantile @ csun
crack cocaine (its a wonderful drug)
feels like i fell asleep on my brain.
currently addicted to:
lux (risk-like video game)
gish (sonic the hedgehog with slow speeds and a blob)
gas station drinks (thats what i call them, any novelty drink like yoo-hoo)
digitally imported (vocal trace radio station on winamp)
dota (as usual)
various nuts
various sunflower seeds
toasted bagels @ the mercantile @ csun
crack cocaine (its a wonderful drug)
Saturday, May 21, 2005
Wednesday, May 18, 2005
if the music bugs you, bugger off :D
dang i wish i could dance like these guys!!!!!
ok not really. but its funny how french people are jackasses at dancing.
dang i wish i could dance like these guys!!!!!
ok not really. but its funny how french people are jackasses at dancing.
Monday, May 16, 2005
and so between fits of getting drunk, flirting with losing my job, and fights with my inner conscience i find myself here.
no more stories of my adventures in the feminine kingdom. every time i do, it never happens.
its wierd. because on one hand, i want to fall in love every night. but on the other hand, when i see a girl i like, sometimes i start singing "baby got back" to mysel;f and she gets wierded out.
tommorrow i see the coast guard recruiter in hawthorne, like south central. i hope i get stationed in hawaii. i'd take any hawaiian girl over that chick i see at school all the time who always covers one nostril with her finger so she can shoot a snot rocket out the other nostril.
i found this wierd piece of crap in a pork rhind the other day. its kind of hard, and flakey. i'm afraid to eat it it because i don't know what it is, but then, its sort of tempting. you know that feeling?
so it just sits there next to my keyboard. like a pet rock. some sort of mystic paperweight i can use to make sure a single "post-it" doesnt blow away. i think i'll name it. i'll call it Gary.
no more stories of my adventures in the feminine kingdom. every time i do, it never happens.
its wierd. because on one hand, i want to fall in love every night. but on the other hand, when i see a girl i like, sometimes i start singing "baby got back" to mysel;f and she gets wierded out.
tommorrow i see the coast guard recruiter in hawthorne, like south central. i hope i get stationed in hawaii. i'd take any hawaiian girl over that chick i see at school all the time who always covers one nostril with her finger so she can shoot a snot rocket out the other nostril.
i found this wierd piece of crap in a pork rhind the other day. its kind of hard, and flakey. i'm afraid to eat it it because i don't know what it is, but then, its sort of tempting. you know that feeling?
so it just sits there next to my keyboard. like a pet rock. some sort of mystic paperweight i can use to make sure a single "post-it" doesnt blow away. i think i'll name it. i'll call it Gary.
Friday, May 13, 2005
an old mp3 playlist of mine, featuring mostly upbeat punky stuff, i usually play it while playing counter-strike. (excluding "23" by jimmy eat world, that song is not all that great but i recently added it because of the concert)
playlist
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
36 tracks in playlist, average track length: 3:32
Playlist length: 2 hours 7 minutes 17 seconds
Right-click here to save this HTML file.
Playlist files:
1. A New Found Glory - Dressed to Kill (3:28)
2. A New Found Glory - Sticks And STones 10 Singled O (3:19)
3. AFI - The Days of the Phoenix (3:27)
4. AFI - Total Immortal (2:44)
5. Alkaline Trio - We've Had Enough (2:50)
6. BestInterest - Prom Girl (2:53)
7. Boy Sets Fire - rookie (4:15)
8. Brand New - Failure by Design (3:15)
9. Brand New - Jude Law And A Semester Abroad (3:42)
10. Punk Homegrown - Christmas Crush (3:25)
11. Homegrown - Surfer Girl (4:31)
12. Jimmy Eat World - Hear You Me (4:37)
13. Jimmy Eat World - 23 (7:24)
14. Jimmy Eat World - Lucky Denver Mint (3:49)
15. Jimmy Eat World - Softer (4:08)
16. Me First and the Gimme Gimmes - End Of The Road (3:00)
17. Me First and the Gimme Gimmes - I Believe I Can Fly (3:01)
18. MxPx - Chick Magnet 2 (3:12)
19. MxPx - Do Your Feet Hurt? (3:09)
20. MxPx - My Life Story (2:47)
21. MxPx - The Wonder Years (1:51)
22. Nerf Herder - 5000 Ways to Die (2:58)
23. new found glory - sonny (3:27)
24. Saves The Day - Cars And Calories (2:45)
25. Saves The Day - Freakish (3:46)
26. STORY OF THE YEAR - So Far So Good (3:23)
27. Story of the Year - until the day i die (4:02)
28. Sugarcult - AudioTrack 03 (3:26)
29. Sugarcult - She's The Blade (2:59)
30. Taking Back Sunday - The Ballad Of Sal Villanueva (3:52)
31. Taking Back Sunday - Your Own Disaster (4:47)
32. The Early November - Left Me Spinning (3:15)
33. Three Days Grace - Just Like You (3:08)
34. Thursday - Paris In Flames (4:33)
35. Yellowcard - (3:24)
36. Yellowcard - 01 - Starstruck (2:45)
interesting what a video of me would look like while playing that game, click here.
bink. bink.
playlist
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
36 tracks in playlist, average track length: 3:32
Playlist length: 2 hours 7 minutes 17 seconds
Right-click here to save this HTML file.
Playlist files:
1. A New Found Glory - Dressed to Kill (3:28)
2. A New Found Glory - Sticks And STones 10 Singled O (3:19)
3. AFI - The Days of the Phoenix (3:27)
4. AFI - Total Immortal (2:44)
5. Alkaline Trio - We've Had Enough (2:50)
6. BestInterest - Prom Girl (2:53)
7. Boy Sets Fire - rookie (4:15)
8. Brand New - Failure by Design (3:15)
9. Brand New - Jude Law And A Semester Abroad (3:42)
10. Punk Homegrown - Christmas Crush (3:25)
11. Homegrown - Surfer Girl (4:31)
12. Jimmy Eat World - Hear You Me (4:37)
13. Jimmy Eat World - 23 (7:24)
14. Jimmy Eat World - Lucky Denver Mint (3:49)
15. Jimmy Eat World - Softer (4:08)
16. Me First and the Gimme Gimmes - End Of The Road (3:00)
17. Me First and the Gimme Gimmes - I Believe I Can Fly (3:01)
18. MxPx - Chick Magnet 2 (3:12)
19. MxPx - Do Your Feet Hurt? (3:09)
20. MxPx - My Life Story (2:47)
21. MxPx - The Wonder Years (1:51)
22. Nerf Herder - 5000 Ways to Die (2:58)
23. new found glory - sonny (3:27)
24. Saves The Day - Cars And Calories (2:45)
25. Saves The Day - Freakish (3:46)
26. STORY OF THE YEAR - So Far So Good (3:23)
27. Story of the Year - until the day i die (4:02)
28. Sugarcult - AudioTrack 03 (3:26)
29. Sugarcult - She's The Blade (2:59)
30. Taking Back Sunday - The Ballad Of Sal Villanueva (3:52)
31. Taking Back Sunday - Your Own Disaster (4:47)
32. The Early November - Left Me Spinning (3:15)
33. Three Days Grace - Just Like You (3:08)
34. Thursday - Paris In Flames (4:33)
35. Yellowcard - (3:24)
36. Yellowcard - 01 - Starstruck (2:45)
interesting what a video of me would look like while playing that game, click here.
bink. bink.
Luke G
Genetics Project – Nyctalopia “Night blindness”
5/6/05
Night blindness and day blindness is a symptom of gene degeneration. There is both an X-linked form and autosomal form. The x-linked version is far more common. Complete night blindness can be caused by a mutation of the NYX gene (300278). This mutation causes a small leucine-rich protein called nyctalopin.
Nyctalopin consists of 481 amino acids. Actually, a family of small leucine-rich protoglycans (LRPs) is produced by the NYX codon. The function of the nyctalopin is only one known so far and that is night blindness in organisms. The specific sequence of nyctalopin is as follows:
1 mkgrgmlvll lhavvlglps awavgacara cpaacacstv ergcsvrcdr agllrvpael
61 pceavsidld rnglrflger afgtlpslrr lslrhnnlsf itpgafkglp rlaelrlahn
121 gdlrylhart faalsrlrrl dlaacrlfsv perllaelpa lrelaafdnl frrvpgalrg
181 lanlthahle rgrieavass slqglrrlrs lslqanrvra vhagafgdcg vlehlllndn
241 llaelpadaf rglrrlrtln lggnaldrva rawfadlael ellyldrnsi afveegafqn
301 lsgllalhln gnrltvlawv afqpgfflgr lflfrnpwcc dcrlewlrdw megsgrvtdv
361 pcaspgsvag ldlsqvtfgr ssdglcvdpe elnlttsspg pspepaattv srfssllskl
421 laprvpveea anttgglana slsdslssrg vggagrqpwf llascllpsv aqhvvfglqm
481 d
Abbreviated (CSNB), Congenital Stationary Night Blindness is actually a group of stable retinal disorders with subtypes and different gene actions. Only one function of this protein is night-blindness in organisms. If we think of nyctalopin as the product of NYX and a small unique member of the LRP protein group, we can say the introns and extrons are very similar between nyctalopin and LRP, which has the same basic sequence.
The expression of the gene is found in the kidney and retina only. In the retina it appears expressed in the photoreceptors, bipolar interneurons, and ganglion cells. Studies done around the year 2000 by Bech-Hanson and Pusch indicate that there are 14 different mutations. Animal model testing done by Gregg in 2003 determine that the phenotype is caused by a 85 base pair deletion in the mouse. Further testing showed that these mice had significant decrease in visual sensitivity. By far more is known now about the x-linked version of night blindness due to this method of testing. Thus, in conclusion, the mouse was a model for human CSNB1 and has been ever since. So far this disease is untreatable as is normal blindness. It is a disability not a lot of people are aware of or have, but we know where it comes from, mutations in the NYX gene, causing the protein nyctalopin to be produced.
thanks for reading the most retarded post ever
Genetics Project – Nyctalopia “Night blindness”
5/6/05
Night blindness and day blindness is a symptom of gene degeneration. There is both an X-linked form and autosomal form. The x-linked version is far more common. Complete night blindness can be caused by a mutation of the NYX gene (300278). This mutation causes a small leucine-rich protein called nyctalopin.
Nyctalopin consists of 481 amino acids. Actually, a family of small leucine-rich protoglycans (LRPs) is produced by the NYX codon. The function of the nyctalopin is only one known so far and that is night blindness in organisms. The specific sequence of nyctalopin is as follows:
1 mkgrgmlvll lhavvlglps awavgacara cpaacacstv ergcsvrcdr agllrvpael
61 pceavsidld rnglrflger afgtlpslrr lslrhnnlsf itpgafkglp rlaelrlahn
121 gdlrylhart faalsrlrrl dlaacrlfsv perllaelpa lrelaafdnl frrvpgalrg
181 lanlthahle rgrieavass slqglrrlrs lslqanrvra vhagafgdcg vlehlllndn
241 llaelpadaf rglrrlrtln lggnaldrva rawfadlael ellyldrnsi afveegafqn
301 lsgllalhln gnrltvlawv afqpgfflgr lflfrnpwcc dcrlewlrdw megsgrvtdv
361 pcaspgsvag ldlsqvtfgr ssdglcvdpe elnlttsspg pspepaattv srfssllskl
421 laprvpveea anttgglana slsdslssrg vggagrqpwf llascllpsv aqhvvfglqm
481 d
Abbreviated (CSNB), Congenital Stationary Night Blindness is actually a group of stable retinal disorders with subtypes and different gene actions. Only one function of this protein is night-blindness in organisms. If we think of nyctalopin as the product of NYX and a small unique member of the LRP protein group, we can say the introns and extrons are very similar between nyctalopin and LRP, which has the same basic sequence.
The expression of the gene is found in the kidney and retina only. In the retina it appears expressed in the photoreceptors, bipolar interneurons, and ganglion cells. Studies done around the year 2000 by Bech-Hanson and Pusch indicate that there are 14 different mutations. Animal model testing done by Gregg in 2003 determine that the phenotype is caused by a 85 base pair deletion in the mouse. Further testing showed that these mice had significant decrease in visual sensitivity. By far more is known now about the x-linked version of night blindness due to this method of testing. Thus, in conclusion, the mouse was a model for human CSNB1 and has been ever since. So far this disease is untreatable as is normal blindness. It is a disability not a lot of people are aware of or have, but we know where it comes from, mutations in the NYX gene, causing the protein nyctalopin to be produced.
thanks for reading the most retarded post ever
Wednesday, May 11, 2005
my cousin is over for 2 days. my roomate is in vegas.
random thing. i shouldn't have to warn you, you should be used to it by now.
everytime i look at my roommates bmw z4, i think, wow, he got that working at dennys and bennihana's. i work as a computer tech and i aint got shit.
ironic is when he parks it underneath the busted sewer line. he doesn't know that every time he parks it there, other peoples bath and toilet water from the whole building just drip down on his new car. and i ain't got the heart to tell him.
so every time i have to take a shit, theoretically i do it on his car.
random thing. i shouldn't have to warn you, you should be used to it by now.
everytime i look at my roommates bmw z4, i think, wow, he got that working at dennys and bennihana's. i work as a computer tech and i aint got shit.
ironic is when he parks it underneath the busted sewer line. he doesn't know that every time he parks it there, other peoples bath and toilet water from the whole building just drip down on his new car. and i ain't got the heart to tell him.
so every time i have to take a shit, theoretically i do it on his car.
Sunday, May 08, 2005
ok here's what happens when i'm real bored...
Soldier
by Destiny's Child feat. T.I.,Lil Wayne
(click here for my beatboxing, then play along with the lyrics)
(lil wayne, click here for luke's rap)Hey, see cash, money is a army
I'm walkin' with Purple Hearts on me
You're talkin' to the sergeant
Body marked up like the subway in Harlem
Callin' em Wizzy F. Baby
Please save the baby
If you don't see me on the block, I ain't tryin'a hide
I blend in with the hood, I'm camouflage
Bandana tied, so Mami, join my troop
Now everytime she hear my name, she salute!
(BONUS TRACK, the chipmunk remix)
thank god thats over with, now you better hope i never get bored again. ever. lol.
Soldier
by Destiny's Child feat. T.I.,Lil Wayne
(click here for my beatboxing, then play along with the lyrics)
(lil wayne, click here for luke's rap)Hey, see cash, money is a army
I'm walkin' with Purple Hearts on me
You're talkin' to the sergeant
Body marked up like the subway in Harlem
Callin' em Wizzy F. Baby
Please save the baby
If you don't see me on the block, I ain't tryin'a hide
I blend in with the hood, I'm camouflage
Bandana tied, so Mami, join my troop
Now everytime she hear my name, she salute!
(BONUS TRACK, the chipmunk remix)
thank god thats over with, now you better hope i never get bored again. ever. lol.
ok so i promised a story. long overdue.
random comment of the day by coworker and only female of the geek squad:
"girls don't dress sexy and hot and cute just to impress guys, they dress to impress women, its about competition"
if it could make it any easier. the greatest story you will ever tell someone is about some event in your life. so basically its gonna be about your life. and the way i see it, this tells my life pretty well.
you know what. i really should go enlist in the coast guard for the 2 year program.
that way all those fucking chicks that are with boyfriends can get their 2 year fuck over with and date a real dude.
a dude who has been on his own. doesn't depend on mama and papa.
a dude who has been there and back. doesn't need to go anywhere.
a dude who can't get his foot in the fucking door.
ain't nothing happening now. every single, wait lemme think. every SINGLE girl i know know has a boyfriend. and i use the word SINGLE loosely. just like the girls.
wtf. last time i check there was a pretty even ratio of men to women in the world. why do girls just settle. or have guys just now become so suave they can go from 0 to woo in under 60 seconds? i can understand. girls. everyday, you are bombarded by penis. guy IMs you. penis. guy sees you at school. penis. there is penis in your face 24-7 and you aren't even a stripper.
so my objective here is to get the penis out of your face and keep it in my pants.
and you know what i get for it? nothing. i don't get the cute girl i have an eye on at school. i don't get the nice girl i meet online. i don't even get the chubby girl who bumps into me on purpose at the mini food market.
nice guys finish last? fuck that. that would be nice. we don't even get to start!
a bad ass part of me also tells me, that won't work either. girls say they want a spontaneously fun guy. but if i came up driving to you on a motorcycle with tickets to the band you've been dying to see, you'd probably just hide in your study cave and worry about your fucking test.
so the guys that SPECIFICALLY get the girl. they are neither bad ass or good guy. are they are either driven by the combination of desperation, greed, and stitch of confidence? maybe some whack sense of humor that makes them laugh. maybe they are just damn lucky.
comming to grips with the luck of these guys. and my own bad luck. now i'm just complaining about my luck. useless. so thats what it comes down to. sitting waiting wishing. why doesn't the right girl just fall from the sky already and break my neck so we could end it all together. the weather today is slightly longing with a chance of mild anger.
you know porn stars? they get everything augmented. they end up getting plastic surgery on their face, boobs, stomach, butt, legs. funny, i did that from head to toe.
anyway, point i'm getting to, isn't even tho their body is completely fake, they still keep one thing real. their fucking pussy.
and point is. even tho time goes on and they fuck and fuck and fuck. they end up having to get even one more augementation.
and guess what that is.
they sow up their fucking pussy. because they became so loose and slutty it becomes like fucking a hollowed out baseball bat from the top.
then the guy has to figure out something else to fuck.
so thats where we get anal sex from.
fuck this. i'm too mad to continue. i'm out.
concert tommorrow. a combination of jimmy eat world and taking back sunday in the mp3 player has made me a very uncharacteristical emo-ish angsty mad. pardon.
random comment of the day by coworker and only female of the geek squad:
"girls don't dress sexy and hot and cute just to impress guys, they dress to impress women, its about competition"
if it could make it any easier. the greatest story you will ever tell someone is about some event in your life. so basically its gonna be about your life. and the way i see it, this tells my life pretty well.
you know what. i really should go enlist in the coast guard for the 2 year program.
that way all those fucking chicks that are with boyfriends can get their 2 year fuck over with and date a real dude.
a dude who has been on his own. doesn't depend on mama and papa.
a dude who has been there and back. doesn't need to go anywhere.
a dude who can't get his foot in the fucking door.
ain't nothing happening now. every single, wait lemme think. every SINGLE girl i know know has a boyfriend. and i use the word SINGLE loosely. just like the girls.
wtf. last time i check there was a pretty even ratio of men to women in the world. why do girls just settle. or have guys just now become so suave they can go from 0 to woo in under 60 seconds? i can understand. girls. everyday, you are bombarded by penis. guy IMs you. penis. guy sees you at school. penis. there is penis in your face 24-7 and you aren't even a stripper.
so my objective here is to get the penis out of your face and keep it in my pants.
and you know what i get for it? nothing. i don't get the cute girl i have an eye on at school. i don't get the nice girl i meet online. i don't even get the chubby girl who bumps into me on purpose at the mini food market.
nice guys finish last? fuck that. that would be nice. we don't even get to start!
a bad ass part of me also tells me, that won't work either. girls say they want a spontaneously fun guy. but if i came up driving to you on a motorcycle with tickets to the band you've been dying to see, you'd probably just hide in your study cave and worry about your fucking test.
so the guys that SPECIFICALLY get the girl. they are neither bad ass or good guy. are they are either driven by the combination of desperation, greed, and stitch of confidence? maybe some whack sense of humor that makes them laugh. maybe they are just damn lucky.
comming to grips with the luck of these guys. and my own bad luck. now i'm just complaining about my luck. useless. so thats what it comes down to. sitting waiting wishing. why doesn't the right girl just fall from the sky already and break my neck so we could end it all together. the weather today is slightly longing with a chance of mild anger.
you know porn stars? they get everything augmented. they end up getting plastic surgery on their face, boobs, stomach, butt, legs. funny, i did that from head to toe.
anyway, point i'm getting to, isn't even tho their body is completely fake, they still keep one thing real. their fucking pussy.
and point is. even tho time goes on and they fuck and fuck and fuck. they end up having to get even one more augementation.
and guess what that is.
they sow up their fucking pussy. because they became so loose and slutty it becomes like fucking a hollowed out baseball bat from the top.
then the guy has to figure out something else to fuck.
so thats where we get anal sex from.
fuck this. i'm too mad to continue. i'm out.
concert tommorrow. a combination of jimmy eat world and taking back sunday in the mp3 player has made me a very uncharacteristical emo-ish angsty mad. pardon.
fucking 19 year olds... literally. ok not literally for me, sickos, but other people.
never again. i swear. never again.
a firm believer that you don't have to scream to say something you honestly mean.
the santeria of it all is that when i'm really pissed YOU get two choices.
either choose the bullet, or choose the fuse.
choose well, those who piss me off. cuz i rarely get pissed. choose well.
consider the fuse lit.
never again. i swear. never again.
a firm believer that you don't have to scream to say something you honestly mean.
the santeria of it all is that when i'm really pissed YOU get two choices.
either choose the bullet, or choose the fuse.
choose well, those who piss me off. cuz i rarely get pissed. choose well.
consider the fuse lit.
Saturday, May 07, 2005
Friday, May 06, 2005
skipped school today to see Ranger Merrell from IRAQ.
he had many stories, and many pictures.
all the war pictures, they looked like art, really, i was moved.
he had these videos and stories of insurgents they caught and interrogated. all i have to say is tazers look like they hurt.
inspired.
i choose to become a member of the armed forces.
i'm going to see a coast guard recruiter tommorrow.
he had many stories, and many pictures.
all the war pictures, they looked like art, really, i was moved.
he had these videos and stories of insurgents they caught and interrogated. all i have to say is tazers look like they hurt.
inspired.
i choose to become a member of the armed forces.
i'm going to see a coast guard recruiter tommorrow.
Wednesday, May 04, 2005
many people ask me why i stay up so late all the time. ok actually nobody does. but i've noticed something.
watching all your friends eventually fade away. every day. every night. some say bye, some don't. one by one they all go to bed. and leave me alone.
i feel like its a lot like that when we get old. we watch our friends die one by one.
call me morbid, but every day i watch my friends die off one by one.
and still i have my little headphones on, listening to my little mp3s. reading, writing, listening. typing. thats what i do late a night every day.
i wish you could actually write handwriting for blogs. you can tell a lot from a person's handwriting. you can tell a lot from a person's anything. every thing they choose from their car to their clothes. from their toothbrush to their lunchmeat.
what i think your handwriting says about you. 3 things are simple. try on yourself. your "I" is, the greater part of you, the outside. the lower part of your tails of "y" and "g", your subliminal. letter spacing, and space inside loops of your letters, your relationships with other people. its called graphology.
for instance, the loop that makes my capital "I" tends to be close at times, suggesting a strong relationship with my parents. maybe thats just when i think of them. other times the loop can be very stretched apart.
my words hardly lean to the left or right. suggesting a strong will. true.
by the way, one night i was taken to a strip club. the white rhino or something. thats when i heard this song you're hearing now. a "nice" girl was doing her thing to this song, and i knew she had to have picked it for the dj to play, and i knew something deeper was there. i mean cmon, its depeche mode. so i went home and downloaded it. tried to feel what she felt.
and sure enough, i felt like i had to give someone a lapdance.
watching all your friends eventually fade away. every day. every night. some say bye, some don't. one by one they all go to bed. and leave me alone.
i feel like its a lot like that when we get old. we watch our friends die one by one.
call me morbid, but every day i watch my friends die off one by one.
and still i have my little headphones on, listening to my little mp3s. reading, writing, listening. typing. thats what i do late a night every day.
i wish you could actually write handwriting for blogs. you can tell a lot from a person's handwriting. you can tell a lot from a person's anything. every thing they choose from their car to their clothes. from their toothbrush to their lunchmeat.
what i think your handwriting says about you. 3 things are simple. try on yourself. your "I" is, the greater part of you, the outside. the lower part of your tails of "y" and "g", your subliminal. letter spacing, and space inside loops of your letters, your relationships with other people. its called graphology.
for instance, the loop that makes my capital "I" tends to be close at times, suggesting a strong relationship with my parents. maybe thats just when i think of them. other times the loop can be very stretched apart.
my words hardly lean to the left or right. suggesting a strong will. true.
by the way, one night i was taken to a strip club. the white rhino or something. thats when i heard this song you're hearing now. a "nice" girl was doing her thing to this song, and i knew she had to have picked it for the dj to play, and i knew something deeper was there. i mean cmon, its depeche mode. so i went home and downloaded it. tried to feel what she felt.
and sure enough, i felt like i had to give someone a lapdance.
Monday, May 02, 2005
i hafta say. was the effort worth the reward?
as soon as the lights hit my face and i saw the crowd, a great feeling of happiness overcame me, like one of those waves that almost killed me on the beach years ago. it was definitely worth 2 days of being sore and frustrated.
thats the moment. just out there on stage. out there, like a ghost of a robot doing some preprogrammed and precoordinated moves. every inch of the theatre seemed packed, i can imagine the parents, jaws open, the friends of the dancers, holding up cardboard signs that should have been on TRL. the lights burned my retina, and i did not look up anymore. as time flowed past, i could only let my body obey the music, until it was over, that seemed so fast.
then it happened. we were nearly halfway thru, then SMACK! my salsa partner ran straight into me and her cell phone and something else i could not see went flying from somewhere out of her. its cool tho, wasn't her fault. wasn't mine. just something that happened.
other than that all went well. we performed like a well oiled machine. like a virus free computer. like a colony of ants. 20 dollars that came out of my pocket was used as a prop and i almost did not find it. good thing i did. we got korean bbq after. or rather, i did. everyone else got tofu soup, because they weren't idiots.
i'll never forget that moment when the lights turned on, and for moments i was somewhere else. crowd jeering like a prize fight match.
till next time, my fellow dancers and thai peoples. '06. i'll be there.
with bells on. one last time.
as soon as the lights hit my face and i saw the crowd, a great feeling of happiness overcame me, like one of those waves that almost killed me on the beach years ago. it was definitely worth 2 days of being sore and frustrated.
thats the moment. just out there on stage. out there, like a ghost of a robot doing some preprogrammed and precoordinated moves. every inch of the theatre seemed packed, i can imagine the parents, jaws open, the friends of the dancers, holding up cardboard signs that should have been on TRL. the lights burned my retina, and i did not look up anymore. as time flowed past, i could only let my body obey the music, until it was over, that seemed so fast.
then it happened. we were nearly halfway thru, then SMACK! my salsa partner ran straight into me and her cell phone and something else i could not see went flying from somewhere out of her. its cool tho, wasn't her fault. wasn't mine. just something that happened.
other than that all went well. we performed like a well oiled machine. like a virus free computer. like a colony of ants. 20 dollars that came out of my pocket was used as a prop and i almost did not find it. good thing i did. we got korean bbq after. or rather, i did. everyone else got tofu soup, because they weren't idiots.
i'll never forget that moment when the lights turned on, and for moments i was somewhere else. crowd jeering like a prize fight match.
till next time, my fellow dancers and thai peoples. '06. i'll be there.
with bells on. one last time.
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